You meet an unique, amazing, adorable person. You have so much fun together. When you are together, everything feels "right". But you live half a world apart and so how can this even be worthwhile?
You land a fun job in an area you've always dreamed of being. It's what you want to do, it's where you want to be... it's like a dream come true! But the paycheck isn't as big as your lists of budget plans and your family say it should be...
Your life is comfortable, you are mostly happy. But something is missing. If you had that last piece, it would be "perfect"... If only I had this... If only I could do that... If only I had the time for these...
This "perfection" we all seem to be waiting for is a terrible obfuscater of vision and an indiscriminate crusher of dreams. It is a lie, a misdirection; there is no such thing as a perfect life, a perfect person, or a perfect situation. Life is not a path toward perfection; life is gloriously imperfect at every bend and turn.
Rather, I believe that perfection lies in the individual moments, the split-second snapshots that make up the substance of our lives:
in the heartfelt smile of a stranger in passing,
in a loving hug from one dear to my heart,
in an instant of unbridled laughter,
in the colors of a sunset,
in the wind blowing wildly through my hair,
in the touch of a lover,
in a note of music that resonates with my soul,
in the clink of a glass with dear friends on a lovely night,
in the eyes of a newborn baby catching its first glimpse of life...
I may never find the "perfect person" to fit some contrived, borrowed notion of what the world around says should be... is that so bad? A preconceived ideal of perfection can only truly breed disappointment and frustration. None of us are perfect.
But can I find people to share moments of perfection with? Absolutely. And to me, this is what life is really all about... each moment strings together with the one before to create the path, the purpose, the substance of my life - of me. And there are many many "perfect" moments on that string, shining and sparkling in my memory.
I don't believe there is any such thing as the perfect job or the perfect relationship or the perfect body... I will never measure up, and neither will anyone else. But if perfection can be found along the way, in myriad small moments and instances throughout the day - which becomes weeks, months, years, until life is spent - isn't this the substance of a life well lived?
"You must live in the present,
launch yourself on every wave,
find your eternity in each moment.
Fools stand on their island opportunities and look toward another land.
There is no other land,
there is no other life but this."
Henry David Thoreau
"To see a world in a grain of sand,
And heaven in a wildflower,
Hold infinity in the palm of your hand,
And eternity in an hour."
William Blake
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| from my painting for a lost friend |
